BEAU’S DRINKING WATER OR BATH ROOM ETIQUETTE
Beau The Cephus has a comment about bathroom etiquette and I, Langston am here to translate and explain his thoughts and ideas.
Beau has always enjoyed good water. Slurping water being his favorite, but he still has an affection for water from the bathroom. Shower stall floor water is one that he holds in high esteem. That being the water left on the floor of the shower stall after a clean adult human has enjoyed a long hot steamy shower. Once the occupant has left the shower and the room, ah the water that is on the floor inside the shower area is as fine and as artistic any water as can be found. When the floor of the shower is still hot. Being able to just stand with the pads of the feet in warm wet water and bend the neck down then cupping the tongue like a soup ladle, scooping up a mouth full of that rinse water into the tongue. Allowing the water to swirl around in the mouth while sucking a small stream of air through the water and allow it to bubble in the oral cavity. The bubbling will enhance the flavor and bouquet of the water to an intoxicating level. Warm water, warm floor, and warm humid air. That is as Beau says his MEOW! The only thing missing is a south-facing window that allows the warm sunlight to fall on a soft cover on the foot of a bed upon which to nap. Beau notes that drinking water unlike slurping water should be served at room temperature. Then the drinker can drink enough to satisfy a big cat thirst without a headache or stomach ache. Good quantities of water help keep the mucus membranes of his most sensitive nose moist, detour disease, soften the stool and provide the correct conditions for meditation purring.
The water from a dripping tub faucet. Just a small dribble, so very palatable. To set down in the tub in front of the faucet and slide the tongue through the thin running stream energizes the soul. With each stroke starting down low and bringing the tongue into the stream and slide up toward the faucet, out of the stream, and into the mouth. This alone is enough to start a purr from deep in the chest and roll it up into the throat.
Water faucets made from metal are good for many reasons. The metal itself aids in keeping the minerals in an equal balance with the nonmetals of the body. A little copper, iron, and nickel promote high-performance thought processes. Beau’s body works better with the proper balance of minerals and traveling mice on their way to a peaceful place. Some plastic faucets have hardening compounds that can creep into even the best water. What he would give to have clay pipes once again from which to drink. Clay pipes remind Beau of the Great Roman Era
Water from faucets that have a little calcium deposit just inside of the opening has a natural rustic flavor. This deposit will give the taste of the mountain water from the Ozarks where the water is filtered through limestone deposits and the limestone hills. That limestone gives the water a natural taste. Not like the distilled sterile water from the laboratories of the world. Nature at its best. The only problem with calcium-rich water is the kidney stones of the kind that have plagued Beau over the many years of his very long life. Beau will be the first to tell you that he does not want to see these deposits, for much like the inside of many natural springs there is a plethora of living things and dirt that is not all that interesting. However all of that said and it must be noted that Beau has eaten pika which is different from pica, not the small type of a printer but the eating of dirt. The dirt he does not like, but sand especially the larger grains of sand get a paw up.
He likes his veggies, well all except the green, yellow, red, and purple ones. He is still not sure about watercress. He will eat watercress if it still harbors small crunchy water insects.
The Cephus is such a complex and varied Feline that his wants, needs, and desires are difficult to explain. At times when he is trying to relate some very important idea or fact about water or his other needs, he will just have his eye glaze over will drift off into a nap. Such a burden to carry for such a proud and famous feline.